C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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