She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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