so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You dont lie about slip and slides
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
