We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
