just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize