How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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