Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
