using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
pop tarts are not kleenex
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize