dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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