we're blogging at a bar
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
