She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
