oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
