Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
