No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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