Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
