Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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