let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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