Why are handjobs necessary in class?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize