I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
