is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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