Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
