p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
We had to coat check the pizza.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
