Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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