Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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