Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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