Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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