She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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