in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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