4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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