so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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