I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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