just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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