sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
