So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
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