dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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