Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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