Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
