I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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