Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
