Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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