I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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