I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
