their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize
