He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
