why didn't you poke me back
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize