how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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