physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize
