My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
They are going to name an STD after you.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
