Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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