...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize